Merry alternative song titles Christmas!

Merry Christmas, all! This one is going to be short; I’m surrounded by people wearing festive sweaters, and someone just handed me a cup of egg nog. Note: for anyone concerned that I’m drinking at this hour (it’s 6:00 a.m. here), let me reassure you that this is strictly non-alcoholic egg nog. It also contains no eggs, and almost no nog as far as I can tell. To be honest, it’s a cup of coffee, but it just sounded more Christmassy to call it “egg nog.”

In years past, I have suggested supplementing your bluegrass Christmas material by mashing up bluegrass and Christmas titles. I referred to this in last week’s “encore presentation” of my Christmas reworking of Molly and Tenbrooks. Some of the top selections in this Christmas mash-up genre were “It Came Upon a Midnight on the Stormy Deep,” “Hark the Herald Angel Band,” and the one I find an excuse to mention every year: “Frosty the Snowman of Constant Sorrow.” 

But what about the bottom selections? The ones that didn’t make the cut? In the Christmas spirit of generosity, and then the Christmas spirit of forgiveness (which I’ll be begging you for later), here are the bluegrass-Christmas mashup also-rans:

“Blue Christmas of Kentucky”

“Up on the House Rocky Top”

“Santa Baby Blue Eyes”

“O Come All Ye Faithful Fair and Tender Ladies”

“Rudolph the Red-nosed Katy Dear” (because everyone loves associating reindeer with murder ballads)

“Jingle Bell Rock Hearts”

Definitely a stretch:

“God Rest Ye Country Gentlemen”

Last, and almost certainly least:

“Old Toy Trains 45”

Dishonorable mention goes to this one that isn’t really a title mash-up. That’s probably the least of its problems as a bluegrass Christmasized, or, more accurately, a bluegrass-ized Christmas song, but here it is:

“Little Forbidden Drummer Boy”

or 

“Little Drummer-who-isn’t-really-a-drummer-because-his-drum-is-mounted-on-a-bass-so-it’s-okay Boy”

Well my “eggnog” has gotten cold, and I’ve taken up enough of your time on Christmas Day. Have a lovely holiday, and we’ll catch up in 2020.